Marlin vs. Dory

I love Finding Nemo. This is one of my new favorite movies! I love the theme of letting go of those fears that hold you back.

We are on the countdown to the last and the biggest race of the year! Beach 2 Battleship is next Saturday. This will be a big milestone race for me and a great way to end the season. Beach 2 Battleship consists of a 1.2 mile swim in the intercostal waterway, a 56 mile bike ride, and a 13.1 mile run. This is known as a “half Ironman” distance race. It is hard to believe that two years ago, my endurance could only take me 25 yards in the pool, around 5 miles on a bike, and about a ½ mile running.


The strange thing that I have learned in my journey to this point is that much of my obstacles are not my endurance, my knees, the discomfort of 3 hours + on a bike, or the navigating in open water. My biggest obstacles are in my head. Over the last two years of triathlons, I have been forced to face one of my greatest fears, water. Growing up, we went to the community pool a few times each summer. I also took swim lessons for several years during the summer in my elementary schools years. I never really gained a comfort or confidence in the water during these experiences. My mom was also out of school during the summers, so as expected she was the one who was at the pool with me. The problem was that my mom has the swimming confidence of a rock! I say swimming confidence and not skill, because I can’t say I have ever seen my mom try to swim. Every so often, she has gotten in the water, but that is about it. I remember the stories that she almost did not graduate college due to having to pass a swim test. I also remember the confidence inspiring phrase; “don’t go too far, because I can’t save you.” To say that I have a healthy fear of the water may be too soft.

I don’t remember swimming again until the summer after 6th grade at Boy Scout camp. During the first few hours you are there, you have to take a swim test to determine your level. In my defense, the water felt sub-zero. In reality it was probably in the low 70s. The test was to jump in the lake, swim down and back beside the dock twice. I jumped in and almost made it down once before having to be pulled out. The next time I tried to swim…..the next summer at a different Boy Scout Camp. That time, I think fear and adrenaline got me to the end.

Flash forward to freshman year at UNCW. We had about 2 weeks of swimming in PE 101 on Monday, Wednesday, and Fridays. This was 6, 1 hour classes. I think I made it to 4 of these and suffered my way through. Four years later, I was in the water again, but this time it was in Mexico snorkeling. I felt that I would be fine since I had a life jacket, but I still remember feeling nervous before I jumped in.

In summary, I would say my lifetime swimming distance prior to two years ago was less than 500 yards. Like many triathletes, my first experience with the sport was watching the Ironman World Championship on tv. I remember thinking how hard and how cool that looked. The one problem, I could not swim. Over the last two years, I have progressed from struggling to enjoying swimming. I am not fast. Compared to most triathletes, I am very slow. But, the speed will come over time. What has been strange is that no matter how many times I am in the water, I still get that voice in my head that thinks back to childhood that says “you are not good in the water”. I was to the point of almost quitting 1 hour before a race this season because of this voice. Thankfully, I did not quit and finished slow, but fine. This was a victory. The next race, the voice was still there, but a little softer because of my prior race success.

My hope is that I will find my confidence and the voice will disappear forever. I greatly enjoy this crazy sport of triathlon and dream of one day racing Ironman in Kona. But for now, in the words of Dory; “Just keep swimming”.