Slipper Socks. Oh, you shouldn't have...you really shouldn't have

Choosing the perfect Christmas gift for your spouse or significant other can be tough. I have never been allowed to forget one of the first Christmas gifts that I gave to Linds after we got married. I am a functional thinker when it comes to gifts, so naturally I remembered something that she had mentioned she would like to have. Unfortunately, when she unwrapped the laundry sorter she was not as excited to have one. Since that year, I have learned that these gifts are like chicken. Without something to add to it, the result is plain, dry, and unsatisfying.

As a holiday token of goodwill to those that may need some assistance, I will walk you through my Christmas gift selection process and reveal what I decided on this year.

Rule #1. Don't start with price! I am a very cheap person, but this is not a good place to start. If you do, you may miss a really good idea. You can determine price once you have a good list to choose from.

Next. Think of what they need, want, want but will not buy for themselves, and don't know that they want but would enjoy. I am a big fan of the last two.

3rd. Always give clues before Christmas. This is regardless if they want them or not. You need to be excited about the gift, so that the clues just keep coming. There is one big rule regarding clues. The clues need to be true, but very misleading. For example, if a chocolate diamond necklace is on the list, a good clue might be "its edible and you can listen to it." Neal Diamond and chocolate, sounds like a good time to me!

I had several good ideas for Linds this year but decided on....OK, on second thought I will just leave you with a clue. It feels good and and it will keep you warm.

If your glass is half empty, you should have tipped your waitress more!

If you could see the future, would your actions be different? There was a book by Bronnie Ware that listed the 5 most common regrets of the dying. They are:

1) “I wish I’d had the courage to live a life true to myself, not the life others expected of me.”

2) “I wish I didn’t work so hard.”

3) “I wish I’d had the courage to express my feelings.”

4) “I wish I had stayed in touch with my friends.”

5) “I wish I had let myself be happier.”

WOW! I bet there are too many people out there that are doomed to have these on their list in old age. I am blessed to have learned early on in life that money, climbing the corporate ladder, and doing things because "that is what you should do", was not that important to me. Money comes and goes. You should be wise with your money, but if you run out, you can always make more. Careers are important, but your kids don't know you as a VP or a "big shot", you are Dad.

So, how do you live without regrets? I have no idea. Hence why I have been trying to finish this post for well over a week now. The best answer that I have is to have fun. It is hard to have regrets when you are laughing, smiling, being silly, and spending time with those that you care about. I have never finished an evening, weekend, or vacation with the family, or even a sick day with Riley and said; "well that was a waste".

As Mark Twain put it:

"Twenty years from now you will be more disappointed by the things you didn't do than by the ones you did do.
So throw off the bowlines. Sail away from the safe harbor.
Catch the trade winds in your sails. Explore. Dream. Discover."

I blew a fuse but I don't need anger management

This weekend was quite busy. One thing that got checked off the list was the outdoor Christmas lights. Well that is to say, until one of the strands blew a fuse. OK, so I had 11+ strands chained together, I was simply trying to be as efficient as possible with the extension cords.

On Sunday we went to the Old Wilmington candlelight tour with Grandma and Pop Pop. Everyone had a great time checking out the decorations and the home renovations. There were several take aways from this tour. Number 1, our yard needs a lot of work. Number 2, Civil War reenactment folks are very hardcore. Anyone who is willing to reenact losing a war year after year is just sad.

No Dog Left Behind

The educational plan of "W", was that all kids should meet standards. Well, I have a challenge in front of me. I am instituting this for Barney. Barney is our family's 3 to 4 year old beagle that we rescued. We already had a beagle, Lucky, that we got as a puppy from a shelter. Having trained one beagle (sort of), how hard would it be to do it with another one? WOW! Barney, due to his age is already set in some habits that we need to break. He is a sweet dog, but his intelligence level is that of the plastic dog at the Old Navy!

The plan: Have Barney to Lucky's level before I start googling bar-b-que recipes for beagles. I will keep you posted as to how I do.

I will take my SAT by proxy!

There was a story on the news this morning about a high school in NY where several kids were paying up to $3,500 for other recent grads to take the SAT for them. As crazy as this sounds, I am sure that this happens all over the country. The goal of the SAT is to measure how a prospective student will perform in college. Each college as a minimum score and a average score for the students. My SAT score was good, but not great.

To be honest, admissions at the "Dub" have gotten so hard that I am not sure that I would get in on my score if I applied today. Now, does that mean that I would not be as good of a student? No. What has happened is that college has become a must. This has caused the number of applications to rise faster than the capacity of the schools. The schools then have to tighten the standards to control the student population. This is very logical.

The bigger question in this situation is, why should we make kids believe if they cannot hit the numbers on their own, that they will be coined a "loser"? I am sure that there are many college programs and on-line programs that would not have the admissions requirements that a big name school has. Besides, have you ever heard of a job applicant getting turned down because their business degree was from an on-line university vs UNC? I know a UNC business grad that graduated the same year I graduated from Wilmington. I got a job as a Loan Officer and he was pushing washers at Sears.

The point is your integrity is far more important than scoring high on a standardized test. If the temptation of ignoring your moral compass to too great, remember Shelf is watching and he will tell Santa!

Is that an elf on your shelf, or is it time to lay off the eggnog?

Holiday traditions are ones that tend to last across the years. Unlike resolutions holiday traditions let us indulge, relax, and act like kids. Some of the best holiday traditions I enjoyed and still do where having a "real" Christmas tree, eggnog, a ridiculous amount of outdoor lighting, and my grandma's chocolate peanut butter balls!

This year, we started a new holiday tradition with R that she is very excited about, Elf on the Shelf. Shelf is the aptly named elf that lives at our house to watch R and report to Santa if she is being good. R got to name the elf. Time out, taking away toys, no tv, guilt, rewards for being good; none of these seem to work on a regular basis. But Shelf dangles Santa like a carrot in front of a bunny! The ironic thing is that she would not go near Santa last year. But hey, I am not complaining.

Linds, my sister, and I will be running a 5k on Thanksgiving morning this year. This will be our first holiday race. I am very excited to burn some calories prior to consuming them all back. Hopefully this will become a annual holiday tradition for us as well. Within the next few years, R will most likely be able to run with us, which would be a lot of fun.

So if you are one of those people who lacks the "la" in your "fa la la la la", start a new holiday tradition. Wear an elf on each shoulder of your best holiday sweater. When in a large pushy crowd start having an argument with them like they are the "good elf" and "bad elf" of your holiday conscience. OK, so after one time you may get locked up, but at least it will be funny!

Mr. Stubby, it's time for a woodworking project!

Since this is the Thanksgiving season, I will start this post as such. I am thankful that I learned woodworking from my father and grandfather, both of whom still have all of their fingers! This is the sure sign of a good teacher.

This Saturday I will be building a train table for a 2 year old boy for Christmas. His mom asked me to build it, and she will paint it to suit her needs. As most of my projects take on a life of their own, my goal for this one will be challenging. Keep it simple, but make it look good!

Sadly, mass produced kid's furniture generally lacks the quality that I would like to see. The fundamental reason for this issue is cost. Manufactures cannot build these items at a cost consumers are willing to pay and still make a profit without the quality being effected. Most of these items you have to assemble yourself with an instruction manual that is written in such a way that a MIT grad would have a hard time with it. The parts lists is made up of veneered press board, screws with plastic head covers, and a cardboard "wood grain" backing.

Kids will be kids, and nobody wants their 2 year old to color on their handmade Amish coffee table. However, wouldn't it be nice to have somethings made well enough to last beyond the life of a set of truck tires?

So, in the words of a true Carpenter; "Come on people now smile on your brother everybody get together love one another right now." OK, so that did not relate at all, but it is the only Carpenter's song I know!